Author Archives: eauroza1

La Mujer Que Pudo Con Todo Mi Abue Mati

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The altar I created was in honor of my grandmother from my father’s side, Matilde Rivera de Auroza. I wanted to do an altar for my grandmother for several reasons. One of them was because I never got the opportunity to meet her in person; she passed away in June 2010. I recall the day in which we got the news that my grandmother died, at first it did not affect me because I did not know anything other than she was my grandmother, and I was younger at the time. As I started to ask around I was influenced by the stories that my family members told me about her that made her such a strong woman. My grandmother suffered a lot with my grandfather while she was alive. When I went to Mexico a year after her death and I saw her grave it made me feel bad for not going when she was still alive. Although I never got the opportunity to meet her, I know she was a wonderful woman and I feel a deep connection to her. My family members from my father’s side say that I have the same personality as my grandmother because we have a great charisma and have such a great heart, which makes us get a long with anybody we meet. My grandmother and I also have several things in common that I did not know about from liking the same food to some face features. Creating the altar in her honor caused several emotions within my persona because I really love this woman, and this altar project has been very meaningful to me.

There are several items I included in this altar for mi abuelita Mati. To begin with I laid out food that my grandmother enjoyed to eat. My mother told me that when you do and altar for someone we have to place food or items that they enjoyed when they were alive. My mother and I cooked a meal for my grandmother so that she can enjoy upon her arrival. We made adovo con pollo, which is basically red chile with chicken a dish that my abue enjoyed as a young girl growing up in Puebla, Mexico. We also added rice and beans to go with the adovo. I also laid out a variety of fruits such as, apples, bananas, pears, and peaches; these were my grandmother’s favorite fruits. Something that could not miss in this altar was pan dulce (sweat bread), typically all altars contain Pan de Muerto, but I also included other types of bread like conchas, colorados that are my favorite as well as for my grandmother. For drinks I placed three, which are hot chocolate so that it can accompany the bread, Coca-Cola because that was my grandmothers favorite type of drink, and lastly water as my mother would say because “she might be in need after her long journey.” Something that was very interesting to me as I placed the items for my grandmother was how one of my tias told my mother that we were not supposed to have opened the can of soda. We were supposed to have left it closed because what if my grandmother decided to take the soda in her journey back. One of the drinks that I did not include and that my grandmother enjoyed was tequila and beer, once in a while my grandmother enjoyed to drink. We placed a candle because that will guide my grandmother to our altar. It is said that candles help the person you are calling get to their destination. Another element that will guide my grandmother to the right path is the Flor de Muerto Terciopelo and Flor de Cempasúchil these are flowers that cannot miss on an altar. The flowers are important because they signify the vulnerable and not permanent life one has, and how one day it is taken away. These flowers also only bloom right on time for Dia de los Muertos. Another important thing in the altar was having the bible open, and having several images of the Virgen de Guadalupe, which is an image we honor a lot in my family, and also my grandmother always prayed to the Virgencita. My family is very catholic so having the image of the Virgen de Guadalupe and the open bible mean a lot in this altar. It was very important for my mother and I to place items that my grandmother enjoyed when she was alive because we want her to feel welcomed when she arrives for Dia de Los Muertos.

My grandmother Matilde married my grandfather Jose Auroza Gonzalez at such a young age. She was around the age of thirteen, and my grandfather was around eighteen or so. In Mexico where my grandparents are from it was very normal for young girls to marry at a young age. During her marriage with my grandfather my abue Mati was a victim of violence, patriarchy, and machismo. My grandfather would always insult my grandmother in horrible ways. For example, whenever my grandmother would prepare a meal for him, if my grandfather did not like it he would throw it on the ground and demand she cooked the food right or make something better. Also if the food did not taste the way it did when she had previously done it he would also throw it to her. My grandfather similar to Miguel Grande in the novel The Rain God by Arturo Islas, he was very machista. My grandfather always wanted to maintain an image in front of people to demonstrate that he was a strong man, not weak. My grandfather never showed love and affection to my grandmother, and never contributed to helping raise her thirteen children. He also never approached his children with love; all he did was hit them if they misbehaved. All my grandfather did was just go check up on his corn mill. He also always demanded that his clothe were nicely ironed and washed to perfection. Any little mistake my grandmother would make he would be quick to insult her about it. My grandfather Jose would not hesitate to scold at my grandmother in front of people making her feel embarrassed and ashamed. As I do class readings, whenever I read about patriarchy and machismo, my grandmother comes to my mind. She was a real victim of what society considered normal. This infuriates me because she did not deserve to be mistreated. She was ripped apart at such a young age, and she passed through a lot of bad moments being with my grandfather. Other women often times also looked down on her and blamed her for what she was going through. Instead of being her support they would say “Ella se lo busco”. Which reminds me of the poem Beneath the Shadow of the Freeway by Lorna Dee Cervantes, where she states, “It’s her own fault, getting screwed by a man for that long”. Instead of reaching out to her people would just watch and not do anything. On the other hand, if my grandmother would have decided to leave my grandfather she would have still been looked at in a negative way because who was going to provide for her and her children if there was not a father figure. Whether one does something positive or negative people always talk. Therefore, everything my grandmother went through was for the love of her children. She had so much love for them that the pain indulged from my grandfather only made her stronger to provide for her children. This only makes me cherish my grandmother even more because she experienced so much, yet she never gave up and kept moving forward. Her children her motivation and encouragement in life that she took all the mistreatment she faced with my grandfather.

The pain caused by my grandfather was killing my grandmother very slowly because she became very ill. My grandmother was diabetic and developed a huge pain in her legs that made it very difficult for her to walk. My father and his siblings would frequently send her money so that she can be cured. However, my grandmother did not want to have a surgery because the doctors told her that in order for her to be cure they would have to remove one of her legs, and she did not want that. Therefore, at a certain point no type of medication or herbal remedy worked to cure her pain, and sadly she passed away. Her death caused so much sadness within my father’s side of the family because they didn’t understand why God took such a strong and caring woman away. My father and his siblings felt so much resentment toward my grandfather, and at first blamed him for my grandmother’s death. They always made comments such as if he would have never mistreated her then she would have not passed away. However, as years have gone by my father and his siblings realize that my grandmother is in a better place with God because she no longer has to suffer with the machismo and patriarchy my grandfather made her live. My grandfather took for granted the love my grandmother had for him because he now knows that he made her suffer, and no one else would have tolerated all his mistreatments the way she did. My grandfather also knows that because of the way he acted this caused his children to not love him. My grandfather pushed his children away and when he tried to win their love back it was already too late.

For so long machismo has been part of our culture. As stated in the poem “Machismo Is part of Our Culture” by Marcela Christine Lucero-Trujillo, “machi-machi-machi-machismo is part of our culture”. However, my grandmothers death stroke the men in my family and made them realize that women are valuable, and that they should not be taken for granted nor should they suffer. My father has always made sure that he makes my mother feel valuable, he makes sure that all roles in the household are equal, and he is not ashamed to cook, clean, and wash clothing. Since my father saw so much violence during his childhood he has made sure that the story does not repeat itself. He has told me several times how he has not been able to forgive my grandfather for everything he ever did, but also that he is sure that he wont make the same mistakes his father did. My other uncles, brothers of my father also make sure to not treat their wives the same way my grandfather treated my grandmother. My father and his siblings also make sure to provide my cousins and I with nothing but love because they know that it also means a lot. In creating this altar I have came to respect, honor, and cherish this wonderful woman. I was never able to have met her in person, but she sure does mean a lot to me. Although she is dead her presence and her strength still impacts me, and I know that wherever she is, she is watching over me, and admiring my hard work to fight against machismo and patriarchy. I will make sure to keep here presence alive and make my cousins see my grandmother through the same lens that I see her. This year my grandmother’s altar was way more meaningful because I was able to make the connection with themes that I have learned in this class. I am also honored to give my grandmother a voice and in sharing her experience to demonstrate the wonderful women she was. I will forever have my grandmother in my heart and love her so much. My abue Mati is my guardian angel one that will never abandon me in my toughest times, and for that I am thankful of because I know she guides me through the good in life.

Race and Racial Idenity

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http://www.nytimes.com/roomfordebate/2015/06/16/how-fluid-is-racial-identity/race-and-racial-identity-are-social-constructs

 

In the readings for this week the main themes are race and identity. Also that there is not only a white and black binary there are other several races, and often times they become biracial. For example the reading touched upon Blaxican. This is a term for a mixture of someone who is black or Mexican/Mexican American. In the article that I looked for this week titled “Race and Racial Identity Are Social Constructs” by Angela Onwuachi-Willig in the New York Times, it talked about race not being biological. Someone who is black in the US might seem white in Brazil or colored in South Africa. Race is socially constructed and often times people feel a certain way about their race because of the way they are treated. An example given was in marriages between black-white. Often times a black individual will gain privileges because they are surrounded by white people, and then they will feel safe, competent, and not seen as a criminal. However, a white individual will experience discrimination because of the relationship they have with someone of color. They will make them feel less white because they are no longer perceived in a good way as before. Society has never accepted other races that are not white. People of color are always experience prejudice. There is not such thing as Civil Rights as the author stated because centuries later people of color are still experiencing higher unemployment rates than whites, also being segregated in schools, and they are more likely to be shot and killed by the police. These experiences make it hard for people of color to take pride in their race. However, there are some that have learned to embrace and love it no matter what others think in society.

Self Identity

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In the Latino USA Podcast “Being Blaxican in L.A”, Walter Thompson-Hernandez born and raised in L.A is a Blaxican meaning his mother is Mexican and his father is Black. At the age of eight he was told that he was Afro-Chicano, however he had no clue as to what that meant. His mother tried pushing him to take a class with a teacher by the name Ms. Sanders because she was black and he would be able to gain some knowledge from her on being black. As he grew older he began to understand that he was biracial. He navigated along with his multiracial experience and decided to create a project that would help others understand both races. His project is Blaxicans of L.A, it is an Instagram page which gives a founding voice and identity and reconciling worlds that were broken. Several biracial individuals have often been looked at when they go out with their parents and they do not have the same appearance. They are asked unnecessary questions that just make them feel uncomfortable. However through this project they are able to accept that they are multiracial and no longer be ashamed. On the contrast, in the article “Why Latinos Won’t Become White” by Gabriel Ana and “The Latino Flight to Whiteness” by William Darity Jr. they bring up a term of “ethnic attrition”. In the article “Why Latinos Won’t Become White” the term ethnic attrition means, “As Latinos intermarry and climb the socioeconomic ladder, the theory goes, they are likely to self identity as Hispanics”. When Latinos gain success they no longer want to be considered a Hispanic because they want to be accepted in society, and rather assimilate and identify as white. They let go of thier own identity in order to fit in within society. Do you believe that is true? Do Latinos not accept their identity after climbing the socioeconomic ladder?

Masculinity Crisis

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http://time.com/4339209/masculinity-crisis/

In the novel The Rain God by Arturo Islas there is a strong sense of masculinity. We are demonstrated how a man has certain things he should do. For example, Miguel Grande is the “macho”, and he portrays that men are guiltless womanizers. “Miguel Grande would scold Maria for allowing his son to play with dolls”(Pg. 15). In this quote we see how a man should not be doing things that are for “women” because if they do they are not seen as masculine anymore.In the article I have chosen to make the connection with the theme masculinity. To be a real man was to be strong, to be a provider, to be in authority, to be the ultimate decision maker, and to be economically, educationally, physically, and politically dominant. However, Jack Myers states that women today are escalating and changing that dynamic. Also to forget about what society has constructed of “men will be men”, and “boys will be boys”. Instead men should have no tolerance for what men have constructed which is sexism and misogyny. Jack Myers argues that patriarchy can be discarded if men become aware, and welcome gender-equality to society. As he states “The future of men is women”. He then lays out ways in which one can become more inclusive of women roles.

The Four Sisters

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In the novel So Far From God by author Ana Castillo we are introduced to a mother and four sisters. The mother is Sofia who is a very empowering women because she is abandoned by her husband which is a gambler. He gambles away several items that belong to Sofia, however, the one thing he cannot get his hands on was her house. Sofia becomes the provider of the family once she is left with her four daughters. Sofia is the one that makes sure they are economically stable. She takes on a huge role when she becomes major of Tome, through her leadership skills the community becomes more collective, and are capable of supporting for themselves. The names of the four sisters are Esperanza, Caridad, Fe, and La Loca. Each sister is very different in their own way. However, they all resemble the significance of a strong women.

Esperanza is the oldest sister, and she represents a Chicana like many of us today because she goes to college and even majors in Chicana/o Studies. She faced a rough time in her relationship with Ruben because she was only being used he only cared about himself, and saw her as an object not a real women. Caridad was the traditional Chicana/Latina. Caridad loses herself when she is in the relationship with Memo. From this “good” women image she becomes a “bad” women. She is out at bars in the night and goes home with men. Fe was very different from the other sisters because her view was based upon the white middle class. She had a job in the financial institutions. However, she faces a tragedy when she is laughed at by Tom in the altar. She then becomes this resemblance of La Llorona. La Loca was a very interesting sister. At a young age she loses her name. Her characteristics are very odd because she is allergic to people and the only individual that was able to touch her was her mother.  La Loca inherited traditional skills like cooking, cleaning, and caring.

Esperanza after she is killed comes back to her family in a spiritual form. However, Fe does not come back at all. In my perspective I believe that she no longer comes back because she abandoned her culture. She became so assimilated with the white middle class, therefore there was no point in her coming back. On the other hand, Esperanza was so always so close to her mother because Sofia depended on her so much. What do you think is the reason for why one of the sisters came back, and the other did not?

What sister stood out to you the most in this novel?

 

Familia Auroza, Mi Todo, From Puebla to Los Angeles

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There are four photos in the photo collage I created. In the top left there is a picture of my parents and I. My father is the man in the middle his name is Braulio Auroza, and my mother is Maria Luisa Plata. On the bottom of the picture with my parents there is a picture of a typical dish “Mole”, which is very well know in Puebla, Mexico where my parents migrated from. On the top right corner there is a picture of one of my cousins whom I consider as a brother to me his name is Miguel Auroza. In the bottom of that picture there is a picture of the main plaza in Atlixco the small city where my parents are from in Puebla. I chose these four pictures because they are the meaning of the love I have for my culture and family.

In our culture we are influenced by machismo, and the way men treat women. As stated in the poem Machismo is Part of our Culture, the man is always the one that says what is to be done, and he is the “patron” at home. However, in my family it is 50/50. My father acts like a machista in some sense because he expects my mother to always have the food ready when he is hungry. My father grew up at a home where he saw my grandmother Matilde always being submissive to my grandfather Jose. My grandmother suffered a lot of domestic violence with my grandfather. Whenever my grandfather would dislike a certain food he would throw it, and make my grandma cook something else. On the other hand, my father is very understanding, and also contributes to chores around the house for example my mother no longer does laundry because my father takes care of that. He does not treat my mother the way he saw my grandfather disrespect my grandmother. In some form my father is pushing away from the “machismo is part of culture”, and making it equal amongst him, and my mother.

My cousin Miguel and I are very close with each other. Since I am an only child he is the person who has seen me grow up, and gives me advice as if I were his little sister. Whenever I talk about him to any one I refer to him as my brother because he is very valuable to me. In the book Next of Kin, we have been reading a lot about the importance of family unity within La Raza. The idea of “la familia” and the importance of being united is very important within the Chicana/o community. I admire my cousin because although he is not a legal U.S citizen he has worked double to earn what he has obtained. He is working hard to obtain his GED, and always opens new doors for himself. He never gives up even when things don’t go in his favor. Also mentioned in Next of Kin “La Familia” is very important within movements. To me my cousin is what keeps me motivated in school. Not only do I want to make my parents proud, but also since I have the privilege to pursue a higher education I want my cousin to be proud and reflect himself in me. We both keep each other going, and push one another for success.

Mole is a very important principle in my culture. In Puebla, Mexico it is a very typical dish that many people request. Whenever there is a family celebration, or a holiday like Christmas my mother and tias always prepare the Mole from scratch. My mother also makes it for Dia de los Muertos. As mentioned in the article Decoding The Food And Drink On A Day Of The Dead there are many things that can be placed in the altar. My mother always makes Mole during this time and then places it on the altar we create for my Grandmother Matilde that passed away. For my culture and family on Dia de los Muertos we place the favorite dish from the person that passed away followed by fruit, and bread. Also the drink they enjoyed the most. My grandmother was the one that gave my mother the Mole recipe before she passed, therefore, my mother and tias always cherish her by making Mole in her honor. Lastly I placed the picture of the Xocalo de Atlixco because every time I go to Mexico I always enjoy going to this place it is a very vibrant location surrounded by many flowers. Atlixco Puebla, Mexico is very well known as Atlixco de las Flores, because there are a lot of flowers that grow there. I also enjoy this place because people are able to express their love for the Mexican culture in a liberal way. In the United States we are unable to demonstrate our Mexican pride. Going back to the Next of Kin Chapter 3 the Chicano culture is not recognized or appreciated in the U.S, and is very much hidden. In Atlixco individuals are greatly recognized no matter what they are not seen less than anyone, even tourist feel accepted. Everyone feels welcomed whether they live there or not.

Carla Trujillo and Gloria Anzaldua

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Carla Trujillo in her reading Chicana Lesbians: Fear and Loathing in the Chicano Community mentions how lesbian Chicanas are seen as a threat in the Chicano community. The Chicano community is based on a patriarchal structure, and heterosexual. It is seen way out of the norm for a Chicana to be a lesbian. Her reading is divided into sexuality, identification, motherhood, and religion. The article that I found was about a famous Chicana queer author Gloria Anzaldua. Anzaldua was an author that wrote about the struggles Chicana Lesbians faced within the Chicana community. Within her writing she served as a way to let others know that there should be no shame in being a Chicana Lesbian. In this article the author goes into depth into one of Anzaldua’s articles “La Conciencia de La mestiza” . Anzaldua knows that she does not belong in her culture because she is queer, however, she creates a new identity for herself and calls it “the new mestiza”. A mestiza in a term used to describe someone with “indigenous ancestry but also shares current civilization blood and traditions” as stated in the article. I found this piece to be a good example because it relates so much to the reading by Trujillo. Today, people are still not widely accepted of Chicana Queer , they are seen as outsiders. However, with readings and allies they are able to live a life where there is no need to hide. These authors are resilient to the negativity the Chicana Community faces them with. And because they feel that they do not belong they create new identities, in which they are able to be accepted.

https://feministtheorykeywords.wordpress.com/2007/12/06/gloria-anzalduas-mestiza/

Chicano Rap and Chicano Movement Poetry

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In Chapter three of Next of Kin, The Verse of the Godfather, Rodriguez elaborates on Chicano Rap and brings up various famous Chicano rappers like Kid Frost. Rodriguez mentions how Chicano Rap is very similar to events occurring in the Chicano Movements because it is a way in which various rappers got their voice herd against things they are passing through or rap about their oppression. Chicano Rap empowers many youth Chicanos. He makes the connection between I am Joaquin by Corky Gonzalez, and La Raza by Kid Frost. “Chicano Rap and Chicano movement poetry must be read as resistance narratives, especially given how both emerge from youth culture and social movement”(Pg. 113). The poem I am Joaquin served to empower several Chicanos, and help them embrace their identity in a time where many Mexican-Americans felt they didn’t, and felt lost. La Raza also got the attention of several Chicano youth making them feel like they belong somewhere. Corky Gonzalez in general was a great speaker during the Chicano Movement, which made him the “godfather” for many Chicanos, and so is Frost because of his promotion to La Raza. Both I am Joaquin and La Raza are based on masculinity and brotherhood, however, it does not mention whatsoever anything about female, or even a queer perspective. Chicano Rap was based on a more patriarchal aspect not being inclusive of gender, and sexuality. In conclusion, I was intrigued by the connection that Rodriguez made about I am Joaquin, and La Raza. It was no surprise to me when I read that Chicano Rap was not popular like other types of music. Like always the minority group was devalued, yet it is fascinating to see that while some might not see it as important it helps to empowers, and encourages many Chicanos youth.

Real Women Have Curves!!!!

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The film “Real Women Have Curves”, illustrates several of the things we have been reading, and learning so far. Ana is a young woman that is very open mined, and knows how to stand up for herself. However, her mother is always on her way pushing her around not letting her strive for what she believes. Yet, in the film we can really see how Ana fights against patriarchy, and what is suppose to be the “norm” for a women. Another main concept in the film is about the “Chicano family”, and education is also a main point in the film.

 

I will begin discussing the ways in which Ana fights against patriarchy. Ana does not let herself from the mean things her mom says to her. She is demonstrating the opposite of patriarchy. She is not submissive to no one, which is how she challenges patriarchy in society. For example, there was a scene in the film where Ana gets upset with her sister for all the work they put into the garment clothe, so that in the end it can be sold for a way more amount of money than the cents the workers are getting paid. Ana sees the inequality there is, and does not put up with it. This also goes hand in hand to as what the “norm” for women is to do. In the Chicano culture women are grown up with the main idea that they are the ones that have to cook, clean, and take care of the children. However, Ana does none of that which is why her mother is frustrated. There is the other example where a woman is to be a “virgin” until they marry, and God forbid they do because then they will be in the mouths of everyone. Like Norma, when Ana’s mom found out that she had sexual relationship before the day of her wedding all the ladies in the factory start gossiping about her in a negative way. The part in the film that stood out the most was the part where Ana and the workers from the factory took off their clothe, and were happy dancing around. This demonstrated how they no longer cared about what others think, and fought against the “norm” of being a woman.

 

Education also plays an important role because as Chicanos education is not often what many people try to aspire. This was clearly demonstrated within the film because Ana had the opportunity to go to college; however, because her mother manipulated her with so many things she did not see the possibility. She did not want to leave her family because she was so attached to them. Many of us as we get older we decide not to leave because we are so attached to our family. However, in the end she realizes that education is very important for someone especially people of color. The film really did a good job at demonstrating concepts from the film. I also liked how this film demonstrated a good concept of the struggles of being a CHICANA.