A Family that Loves, Learns, and Grows
My family has always been the type to do everything together. It is rare for us to not plan a football Sunday, backyard bbq, or some kind of day for all of us to spend time together. We truly symbolize what it means to be a close family. There are five of us living in my house right now: my dad, mom, sister, cousin and myself. In my immediate family it is my dad, mom, two sisters and me. My older sister recently married and had a girl. So as you can see, my poor dad is surrounded with nothing but girls and my brother-in-law (when he isn’t at work). My house is dominated by the girls. I truly love the dynamics of my family. There have been several times when I invite people to come hangout at my house and I am repeatedly told that I am blessed with the family I have. My family is the a perfect(and not so perfect) representation of what it means to love, learn, and grow.
My mother created the life full of love that she wanted for herself and her family. My mother was born in Cuidad Juarez, Mexico and came to the United States at the age of three. From a young age she knew what it was like to have to care for yourself and work hard. She is the reason our family is so full of love. My mom is the reason I have such a close relationship with my sisters. Every since I can remember she would tell us, you will have a lot of best friends but no one will take the place of your sisters. She taught us just how special it was to be a good person to everyone. She was the first person I ever looked up to.
The relationship that my mother and my father had was very influential to me. My parents always showed each other respect, support, and love. There was never a time when I questioned the actions of either parent. Unlike the machismo attitudes that exist in most Chicano families, my family practiced respect and equality. This is something that will always be in my mind and it is something I expect from the person I am with. The traditional patriarchal family is something we have shied away from and we reproduce a more of a woman family. The role of the traditional Mexican woman is not something you’ll see in my family. We have always been taught to work hard, follow our dreams, and never rely on anyone to take care of you. My parents have really emphasized the importance of independence, self-respect, and love into our family and making sure that we practice those characteristics as well.
Education was always something my parents and extended family has encouraged and expected us to go after. My grandmother has a third grade education. My parents have a junior college education. Their motto was that if we didn’t want to go to college then we had to get a job and move out as soon as possible. My sister and I will be the first in our family to graduate with our bachelor’s degree and we owe that to our family support system. Throughout the five generations of family that I have seen grow, I have noticed a shift in the focus of school and education. The social and cultural factors of all the different generations have influenced that. If my mother was born into a rich family, she would have had the opportunity to concentrate on her education but instead she and my grandmother were busy working to support a household. My parents were fortunate to find each other and create a life they both wanted and I am lucky enough to be able to work and go to school thanks to the foundation my parents have built.
Everyone in my family has a strong sense self, growth, and adventure. I believe this is something that started with the oppression my grandmother felt when she was trying to raise 5 children and go through a divorce. In her later life and into my mom’s adult life, my grandmother began to find who she really was outside of defining herself with a man. She has inspired all of us to travel, learn new things, and find who we really are outside of the typical 9-5 routine that is promoted by American life. Every time I see her she reminds me to continue to better myself and pursue all the things that make me happy.
I have found that I emphasize loving, learning, and growing, just as much as my family has done to me. I notice this with the way I interact with my five year old niece/god daughter. She is the smartest kid I know and I really give the family credit for it. We have always explained things to her from a young age. We always answer all the questions she has (no matter how insignificant they may seem). We always take her to new places and let her grow as a child. As her godmother, I want her to know that she can achieve great things and be happy. She is the future generation of our family and I want her to carry this sense of family with her wherever she goes.